2am
by jENN1511
Summary: It's 2am. It's been 5 years since Jude left Canada, and everyone there, behind to be a rock star. Jude is now looking back on her life. Wondering if she made the right decision.


**2am-Jude1511**

**Summary:**It's 2am. It's been 5 years since Jude left Canada, and everyone there, behind to be a rock star. Jude is now looking back on her life. Wondering if she made the right decision.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Instant Star or 2am by Alexz Johnson. All I own is my words and my computer.

**Jude's POV**

* * *

_Snow falls on the city  
White on white  
It's the color of hope  
On an unforgiving night  
_

Jude Elizabeth Harrison. What have you gone and done now? You left your family, childhood, and love of your life behind. It's been 5 years to date. You were standing on that stage, preparing to introduce your fiancee, Tommy Quincy (or Dutois), to the world. Preparing to preform the song you wrote when you were locked up in a basement with a crazed fan. A song that you happened to put all your love and heart into.

_You kissed me into ruins  
Sin on sin  
Now I gotta love your love letters  
Written on my skin_

You remember when he kissed you right? Of course you remember...It WAS your sixteenth birthday you know. There you were on the fire escape outside of G-Major, tearing yourself up over what you could have possibly done wrong for Shay to cheat on you with Eden. That slut! All of the sudden Tommy Quincy shows up to save the day. He said all the right things, he even took off his jacket to keep you warm. Then he kissed you, you two were never the same after that huh? At to make matters worse and even more complicated, he had to take it back. Who takes a kiss back? Seriously. That just broke your heart, finally being able to express your deep emotions for him, and he says they don't exist.

_I can't tell the stars  
from the downtown lights_You tried to get over him. You really did. But Tommy Quincy is not a man who can easily be forgotten. Sure you pretended to move on, you even dated your best friend. Then you dated your lead guitarist in your band. But nothing really kept you away from him huh? You just had to keep running back to him. I don't even think it would be called running. More like sprinting. You clung to him like he was your oxygen, without him you would die. You tried to tell yourself that you were over him. That you were done with his lies. But you couldn't. You loved him. Lies, parachute pants, hair gel in all.

_If I said I was truly over you  
My heart would say amen  
But I'd give into the cold caress  
Of 2am  
If I admit I can't get used to this  
Will my heart break again  
As I fall  
Into the waiting arms  
Of 2am_

When you two finally got together. You were overjoyed. You were nearing that magical age of 18. But that didn't really work out either. Here's the thing about Lil Tommy Q. He has a past. I mean, who doesn't? But with him, that past stays hidden in the back of his mind until if comes out and slaps him hard in the face. Tommy is not one who likes to take pity. He'll say he's fine. But you knew. You knew something was wrong, but you immediately thought that it had something to do with you.

So, on the night of your 'magical' 18th birthday, you declare you love for him to the world, in a song. A song that he wrote for you. And when it came time for him to say something, or comment on said song, he said that you were drunk, and that you were embarrassing yourself. You were shocked, to say the least. So you run off to dear old dad for comfort and support, while Tommy runs off to your sister Sadie for 'comfort' and 'support'. You have to give him a little credit though. I mean he was drunk off his head. And his ex-girlfriend's brother was after him for revenge. Not that you knew anything about that.

_Someone's scratch music  
Through the walls  
Sirens waving through the streets  
I must have missed your call_

After you have a little heart to heart with your dad, you march your ass right on up to his hotel room, to get an explanation and maybe an apology. But no. Jude Harrison could not get that. Didn't you know that it's like a law for every single birthday of yours to be emotional and drama filled.

So you're at his room right? The door is cracked just a tiny bit, so you push it open to see him on his bed. But he's not alone...your sister is there too, kissing him. So you do the whole "it's over" thing and high tail your ass back downstairs trying to prevent yourself from having the biggest breakdown of your life. You and your good ole pal Jamie Andrews head over to 620 (your rehearsal space) and spend the rest of the evening dancing and scarfin' down on some chinese take out. Nothing like spending your birthday with your best friend...who blamed you for his girlfriend'd death and is completely head over heels in love with you. Good times. I would say that this birthday is drama filled to the max.

_I'm gathering up these nights  
Black on black  
I know you heart like it's my own  
And it makes my heart go slack_

So skip over some more drama filled heartbreak, love, more heartbreak and then your standing there on the stage. Your fiancee (Tommy) is standing backstage, waiting for you to call him out on stage to accompany you for your new song on the piano. But you can't. Instead you take the easy way out. You publicly break up with him on-stage and then sing another song. A song about a girl who is in love with music. A girl that believes music is her whole life and no one else can be a part of that. That you have to choose one or the other. That you have to go to London alone.

_I can't tell the stars  
from the downtown lights_You left for London without even a goodbye to the man you loved with all your heart. He stood there in the crowd watching you leave, never knowing if he'd ever see you again. You just left. I never knew you could watch someone's heart break. But standing there looking at him, maybe for the last time, you saw his heart break. Well not literally pop out of his chest and break into pieces onto your driveway, but in his eyes. He understood why you wanted to do this alone. He wanted marriage and commitment...he just wanted you. But you wanted music, and adventure, and excitement. So you left.

_If I said I was truly over you  
My heart would say amen  
But I'd give in to the cold caress  
Of 2am  
If I admit I can't get used to this  
Will my heart break again  
As I fall  
Into the waiting arms  
of 2am_You kept that foil ring he gave to you in the restaurant. Even though the next day you both went shopping for a real engagement ring. 2 years after you left, you met a guy named Ben. He was great, he really was but he could never replace Tommy, ever. You read in a tabloid that Tommy met another woman, they got married and had a daughter named Jude (big surprise!). You feel happy for him, truly. I mean you met another guy, why shouldn't he move on also.

On your 21st birthday, Lil Tommy Q. flew to London for a little visit. He showed up at your doorstep and you thanked God that Ben was at work. He told you that there was no way that he could miss you 21st birthday. You guys talked for hours told each other all the exciting things that have happened to you while you two were apart. And then it happened. Come on, like you didn't see this coming. You and Lil Tommy Q. somehow made it into your bedroom.

I guess you could say this was closure. It was no attachments, I mean after all Tommy kinda had a wife and kid to go home two, and you had Ben. It was great while it lasted, but both of you knew that nothing could happen, you two had completely different lives now, it wasn't worth messing them up. He flew back to Toronto and you stayed with Ben, who a week later proposed. You said yes, of course.

_If I said I was truly over you  
My heart would say amen  
But I'd give in to the cold caress  
Of 2am  
If I admit I can't get used to this  
Will my heart break again  
As I fall  
Into the waiting arms  
Of 2am_

Now it's been 5 years since you left Canada. You are happily married to Ben and you have two kids. A girl, Lucy Marie Anderson and Christopher Thomas Harrison. Lucy is now 3 months old and Chris is 3. Chris doesn't have Ben's last name because when you were pregnant with him, you weren't married to him. You just happened to be dating him while a certain ex-boy-bander was in town. For you kinda slow ones I'll break it down. CHRISTOPHER THOMAS HARRISON IS TOMMY QUINCY'S SON.

Now that we are all on the same page, let's get back to the story. You're here sitting in a hospital waiting room. About a year ago Tommy got cancer. Sadie, who still kept in touch with Tommy and is now married to Kwest and is expecting their 3rd child soon, called you about 4 days ago telling you about Tommy. It was around 3 in the morning for you since Canada and London is about a 5 or 6 hour time difference. You practically jumped on a plane in your pj's, but Ben talked some sense in you. You left that day, during normal hours (fully dressed by the way) to Toronto General Hospital. Ben stayed at home with the kids, you said yourself that this was something you needed to do on your own.

The doctor said that the cancer was spread all over Tommy's body, and that he would most likely die soon. You waited for hours and hours sitting in that waiting room, to be able to have a chance to go in and see him. Finally at around 1:30 in the morning, the doctor came out and said, "Tom Quincy is asking for a Jude Harrison..." You stand up and follow the man to his room. Before you go in you look at your reflection in the glass from the door and straighten up your hair and try to wipe the tears from your face so you won't look too terribly bad.

As you walk in the room, the sound of Tommy's slowing pulse fills your hears. "Hey Quincy, how's it going?" you whisper softly, his eyes follow the sound of her voice to look at you. He notices the dark circles under your bloodshot eyes and motion for you to come sit next to him on the bed. "Hey girl, it's good to see you." A tear rolled down your face when you hear how weak he sounds. "You're going to be okay, Tommy, you can't die...you just can't...i don't care what the doctor says...your.." Tommy puts a finger on your mouth to silence you.

"Jude, I'm dying...there's no point in denying it, you and I both know it." Another tear rolls down your cheek and onto your chapped lips. Tommy reaches over and pulls your face closer to his and tugs your bangs behind your ear. He rests his hand on your cheek and wipes your tears away. "I love you Tommy, I can't lose you..." you confess. You lay down putting your head on his chest, he strokes your hair and pulls you tighter to him.

"You'll never lose me girl, I'll always be here..." he says to you, pointing a finger to your heart. He leans down and places a sweet, loving kiss on your lips. "I love you Jude. I always will..."

You snuggle into his loving arms again and let the beating of your hearts be the only conversation. Soon enough you drift off to sleep, holding onto each other, gently. You feel his grip on you loosen up and you look up to him. "Tommy?" A loud, long beep fills the quiet air of the room. Doctors come into the room and start checking the machines, and opening his eyes and testing his heart and breathing patterns.

"Time of death...2am..."

You fall to your knees and start crying, the door opens to his room revealing a tall brunette woman holding a little girls hand. "Come on Jude, come say bye to daddy." The little girl runs over to you instead asking her mother who you are. "That's Jude Harrison honey..." The girl looks into your eyes and hugs you. "You be my daddy's girl...he told me he named me after his girl..."

_Of 2am  
Of 2am_

* * *

So that was it...please review and tell me what you think.  
-Jenn


End file.
